Craft Intriguing Openers
Crafting an attention-grabbing opener is crucial for sparking his interest and making him eager to initiate contact. Here are several techniques to craft intriguing openers:
Be Specific and Personalize: Instead of generic greetings, tailor your opener to his interests or activities you’ve observed on his social media. For example, if you noticed he’s passionate about photography, you could say, “Hey John, I couldn’t help but notice your incredible travel photos. Where did you capture that stunning sunset?”
Ask a Thought-Provoking Question: Engage his intellect by asking a question that sparks curiosity or invites his opinion. This could be related to his views on current events, his favorite hobbies, or his travel aspirations. For example, “Hey Mark, I’m curious about your thoughts on the latest art exhibition. What did you find particularly inspiring?”
Use a Playful Teaser: Send a witty or enigmatic message that piques his interest and leaves him wanting more. For example, “Hey Alex, I have a riddle for you: What’s always there but can’t be seen? Just reply with your guess and we’ll chat more.”
| Example | Notes |
|—|—|
| “Hey, I saw you’re a fan of classic rock. I’m in the mood for some Led Zeppelin right now. Want to listen together?” | Tailored to his interests |
| “I’m not sure if you remember, but we met at that coffee shop last week. I’ve been thinking about your insights on the book we were discussing.” | Personalizes the opener |
| “What’s your favorite travel destination that’s off the beaten path?” | Sparks conversation and reveals his interests |
Keep Him Guessing and Wanting More
Keeping him guessing is crucial to maintain his interest and desire to pursue you. Engage him in playful banter, respond to his messages intermittently, and maintain a sense of mystery. Avoid revealing too much personal information upfront, as this can quell his curiosity. Instead, gradually unveil details that will intrigue him and keep him wanting more.
Use Thought-Provoking Questions
| Thought-Provoking Questions | |
|---|---|
| What’s something you’re passionate about that you wish more people knew about? | It encourages him to share his interests and demonstrates that you value his opinions. |
| If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why? | Inspires his imagination and shows that you’re interested in his dreams and aspirations. |
| What’s a hidden talent or ability that you have that most people don’t know about? | Creates a sense of intrigue and highlights his unique qualities. |
Use Strategic Delay and Spacing
Timing is crucial in text messaging if you want to create anticipation and intrigue. Avoid bombarding him with messages one after the other as this can come across as desperate or needy.
Instead, adopt the following strategies:
Delay Your Responses:
Don’t reply immediately to his messages. Give him some time to wonder what you’re up to and build anticipation. A good rule of thumb is to wait at least 5 minutes before responding, depending on the context of the conversation.
Use Strategic Spacing:
When typing your messages, avoid using long, drawn-out responses. Break them up into shorter, more manageable chunks. This creates a sense of mystery and gives him time to digest your words before moving on to the next message.
Craft Thought-Provoking Questions:
End your messages with questions that require more than just a yes or no answer. This prompts him to think about his response and encourages deeper conversations. By leaving a question hanging, you maintain his interest and keep him wanting more.
| Example of Ineffective Texting: | Example of Effective Texting: |
|---|---|
| Hey! What’s up? | Hey! I just finished watching a great movie. What did you do today? |
| Cool, let’s do it. | Sure, I’d love to. What time works best for you? |
| Night. | Goodnight! I enjoyed chatting with you. See you soon. |
Be Playful and Humorous
Spice up your texts with a dash of humor and playfulness. This shows that you’re not taking things too seriously and that you’re up for having some fun. Share amusing anecdotes, send funny GIFs, or poke light-hearted fun at yourself. Just remember to avoid overdoing it, as constant humor can lose its charm.
Types of Playful and Humorous Texts
| Type | Example |
|---|---|
| Funny Story | “I just saw a squirrel chasing a bird into a tree. It was like a ‘squirrel and bird’ Hitchcock movie!” |
| GIF | Send a GIF of a cat playing the piano or a group of people laughing hysterically. |
| Self-Deprecating Humor | “My hair is so messy today that I look like I just got out of a wind tunnel.” |
When using humor, be mindful of his tone and reactions. If he doesn’t seem receptive to your playful messages, it’s best to dial it back slightly. The goal is to make him smile and feel a connection with you, not to turn him off.
Avoid Being Overly Available
The key to getting him to chase you over text is to avoid being overly available. This means not responding to every text message right away, and not always initiating conversations. It’s also important to avoid sending long, rambling texts that could bore him.
Instead, keep your texts short and sweet, and only respond when you have something interesting or valuable to say. This will make him more likely to look forward to your texts, and will make him more likely to initiate conversations himself.
6 Tips for Avoiding Being Overly Available
| Tip | Reason |
|---|---|
| Don’t respond to every text message right away | This will let him know that you’re not always available, and it will make him more likely to think about you when you’re not texting. |
| Only initiate conversations when you have something interesting or valuable to say | This will make him more likely to look forward to your texts, and will make him more likely to initiate conversations himself. |
| Keep your texts short and sweet | Long, rambling texts can be boring and overwhelming. Keep your texts short and to the point, and he’ll be more likely to read them. |
| Avoid using emojis and abbreviations | Emojis and abbreviations can make your texts seem childish and unprofessional. If you want to get him to chase you, avoid using them. |
| Proofread your texts before sending them | Typos and grammatical errors can make you look sloppy and unprofessional. Proofread your texts before sending them to make sure they’re error-free. |
| Don’t send multiple texts in a row | If you send multiple texts in a row, it can come across as desperate and needy. Instead, send one text and wait for him to respond. If he doesn’t respond, don’t send another text until later. |
Don’t Overuse Emojis or Exclamation Points
While it’s perfectly fine to use the occasional emoji or exclamation point to convey enthusiasm or express a particular emotion, overusing them can be a turn-off. It can make your messages seem immature, overwhelming, or even desperate. Additionally, using too many emojis or exclamation points can make it difficult for the other person to read and understand your messages.
It’s generally best to use emojis and exclamation points sparingly. If you’re not sure whether or not to use an emoji or exclamation point, it’s better to err on the side of caution and leave it out.
If you still want to add any emoji or exclamation point, here are some guideline:
| Categories | Action |
| Face emoji | You can use the face emoji when talking about your feeling, or expressing your emotion. |
| Hand emoji | You can use the hand emoji when expressing your thank, greeting, love, or other hand-related action. |
| Exclamation points | Exclamation points can indicate excitement, urgency, or some other emotion, be careful not to overuse it and use it when appropriate. |
Maintain a Consistent Messaging Cadence
Establishing a regular messaging pattern is crucial for keeping the conversation flowing and showing your interest. Aim to send messages at a frequency that feels natural and comfortable to both you and the recipient. Avoid bombarding them with messages or leaving them hanging for days. Here are some guidelines to consider:
- Frequency: Start by sending messages every 1-2 days. As the conversation progresses, you can adjust the frequency based on the other person’s response time and engagement level.
- Timing: Choose times when you know they’re likely to be available, such as after work or in the evenings.
- Quality: Focus on sending meaningful messages that add value to the conversation. Avoid generic or superficial texts.
- Variety: Mix up your messaging styles to keep things interesting. Use a combination of text messages, emojis, and voice notes.
- End on a High Note: Always end your messages on a positive or intriguing note to leave them wanting more.
- Respect Boundaries: Be mindful of their response time and don’t pressure them to reply immediately.
- Use Open-Ended Questions: Ask questions that encourage them to share their thoughts and feelings, which can prolong the conversation.
- Follow Up: If they don’t respond within a reasonable amount of time, send a polite follow-up message to check in.
- Keep It Casual: Avoid coming across as too intense or overeager. Maintain a relaxed and playful tone.
| Messaging Frequency | Examples |
|---|---|
| Every 1-2 days | Good morning message, check-in during the day, goodnight message |
| Every few days | Weekend plans, asking for their opinion on something, sharing a funny anecdote |
| Weekly | Catch-up messages, in-depth conversations, sharing personal updates |
End Conversations on a High Note
The way you end a conversation can have a significant impact on whether or not he wants to continue chatting with you. Aim to leave him feeling intrigued, wanting more, and eagerly anticipating your next exchange.
Here are 10 specific tips for ending conversations on a high note:
| Tip | Effect |
|---|---|
| Ask a thought-provoking question that leaves him curious. | Ignites his interest and makes him eager for your next conversation. |
| Share a personal anecdote or insight that makes him feel connected to you. | Creates a sense of intimacy and leaves him wanting to know more about you. |
| Use humor to make him smile and leave him feeling uplifted. | Creates a positive association with you and makes him more likely to want to engage with you again. |
| Be playful or flirtatious, but not overly so. | Injects a touch of excitement and leaves him feeling intrigued. |
| Express appreciation for his time and attention. | Shows him that you value his presence and makes him feel good about himself. |
| Use a call to action, such as asking him to meet for coffee or suggesting another topic to discuss. | Gives him a clear indication that you’re interested in continuing the conversation. |
| End with a compliment that makes him feel good about himself. | Boosts his self-esteem and leaves him smiling even after the conversation has ended. |
| Use emojis or GIFs that convey a positive or playful tone. | Adds visual interest and helps to create a more engaging experience. |
| Leave the conversation on a slight cliffhanger. | Leaves him wanting more and eager to hear what you have to say next. |
| End the conversation before it starts to drag on. | Prevents him from getting bored and makes him more likely to want to pick up where you left off later. |
